Evil Joy Speaks

Spawning the next generation of evil genius, one misadventure at a time

Tag: consequences

Consequences and Life Lessons

This week one of my kiddos learned about consequences. It totally sucked. This kid missed a deadline and as a result received a pretty (in my opinion) severe consequence. My child was upset and is still pretty devastated.

Guess what I did.

NOTHING. 

No phone calls, no arguing on this kid’s behalf…nothing.

I’m so over parents fixing problems for their children. My kid screwed up and has to pay the price. In the scheme of things, it’s so not a big deal even though – at the moment – it seems like the end of the world.  Anguish and heartbreak over this issue will pass. No one was injured – other than some possible pride – no damage was done. In fact, I’m almost glad it happened. My kid was upset about missing the deadline – more so than the consequence itself. To me that speaks to this kid’s character and this experience will reinforce the things this child values.  If one is to mess up, messing up when you’re a kid is the time to do it.

THE TIME TO LEARN. 

How are our children supposed to learn anything if every time they drop the ball mommy and daddy run in and fix it for them? I understand that there are times when intervention is needed and required. But when rules are broken, bent even, and consequences are applied, it’s practice for life. As an adult, if you miss a deadline for a project there will be fallout. If you don’t pay a bill, there’s a penalty. At university if you don’t turn in an assignment on time, a note from mom and dad will not fix the issue. Why not get back to teaching our kids that rules are rules. And they apply to all.

Before you go all crazy on me, I understand there are times when advocating for your child is necessary. I’ve recently experienced this situation as well. My point today is that not EVERY situation requires intervention. We want to grow responsible, compassionate humans. Failing is part of growing.

I let my kid grow. 

Evil Fibbing…..

Evil Joy here with a post on silliness, fun, and Evil Joy Speaking Loudly.

Yesterday was a good day.  We got to the Y while Eldest Spawn was at Raider Elite.  Got home.  Cleaned up the house.

The Spawn didn’t run fast enough or hide quickly enough to evade what they term Evil Whole House Pick Up.  I call it – Mom Is Sick Of Doing This All Herself and You Made The  Messes (or Atleast Some Of Them (as I’m sure to be argued with “I didn’t do that!”)) SO GET OUT HERE AND HELP ME!

At the completion of Evil Whole House Pick Up, Spawn went outside to play.  Mid afternoon I called them in for a break from the heat and to rest up for ball.

Eldest Spawn – he and the couch are friends.  He and his iPod are friends.  They were all friendly with each other, no problem.

Female Spawn….well…they were on Evil Silly Mode yesterday.  Now, I love Silly Mode.  It only becomes Evil Silly Mode when they destroy and then EVIL FIB about cleaning up said Evil Silly Mode Messes.  Then Evil Joy must speak, and Evil Joy will speak loudly if necessary.

But their giggles, uncontrollable from the sounds of it…..Love.That.

Here’s what they were up to :

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And yes, the bulk of their Spawn ‘bodies’ is made up of some of the blankets we own.  Only some.  (Which means we will be donating several as the cold season approaches.)  Additional ‘body bulking’ items included, but were not limited to :

1. Eldest Female Spawn’s robe

2. Middle Female Spawn’s robe

3. Littlest Female Spawn’s robe

4.  Sweaters

5.  Sweatshirts

6.  You get the idea….

Now keep in mind the temps hit near 90 degrees and the humidity was high for us Wisconsin Weenies.  Yet my Female Spawn layer themselves in sweat producing layers and have the best time of their lives…….until……

We got home from ball in shifts.  Eldest Spawn had a game at one location (with me and two youngest Spawn) and Eldest Female Spawn had a game across town.  Now, before we left for ball, I specifically asked, “Did you put the things you were playing with away properly?”  “Yes Mom, of course,” is the answer I received.

BUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZ.  Wrong Answer!

Upstairs was trashed.  I was Evil Joy and I was Loud Evil Joy.  Female Spawn knew they were in trouble because there was no whining – just working.  After 20 minutes, order was restored.  Now I’m not a clean house nazi – just ask anyone who knows me – my house is usually messy – with 4 Spawn, a dog, and life – I’m real, we live in our house, messes are made.  But after spending 2 + hours tidying – not actual dirt digging out cleaning – just tidying – I was Evil Annoyed at the mess.

Evil Joy did back off and Mom reappeared.  Stories were read, songs sung, kisses and hugs shared.

Spawn – listen here.  I love that you play and have fun.  It makes my heart sing.

I don’t love when you lie.  It’s wrong.  Don’t. Lie. To. Me.  You will be caught, found out, busted, whatever – it’s best you learn this now when the consequences are small but strong because as you get older ….. I’ll be more Evil if lying occurs.  Just sayin’

EJ out – to do some laundry.  Evil Laundry found while tidying……..

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