Evil Joy Speaks

Spawning the next generation of evil genius, one misadventure at a time


Today’s post is a writing challenge. This is how it works: participating bloggers picked 4 – 6 words or short phrases for someone else to craft into a post. All words must be used at least once and all the posts will be unique as each writer has received their own set of words. That’s the challenge, here’s a fun twist; no one who’s participating knows who got their words and in what direction the writer will take them. Until now. At the end of this post you’ll find links to the other blogs featuring this challenge. Check them all out, see what words they got and how they used them.


I sit with my Keurig in pieces.  The insides of the machine look like a piece of medical equipment.  As THEY SHOULD.  CAFFEINE.  Caffeine.  My sweet nectar of life.  And the Keurig is holding my coffee hostage and I’m starting to loose my mind.  How?  Why?  What am I going to do?  My logical brain says you can drive to the nearest Star-ibou (we have a couple of chains up here – Starbucks, Caribou, Dunn Bros, plus all the AMAZING local places I love).  My emotional brain says, “I WANT MY COFFEE NOW!” image1I’m out of Diet Coke too.  And Diet Pepsi.  And Diet Dew. This is a caffeine emergency.  I don’t physically need it as in I’m not addicted to it. But I’m mentally addicted to my routine.  And my routine has been altered.  As uber type A this is a problem.  Until the caffeine requirement of the morning is met, I’m going to have a problem.  I can’t sit at my computer, write amazing, funny, and witty things until I have my beverage.

I load up into my car.  Even that routine is messed up.  Dr. Evil took my truck to the airport for the week.  It’s so much cheaper to drive his go-go compact car and with him gone the remaining family will fit inside.  (It only seats five…there are six of us.) As fall has arrived all things Pumpkin Spiced Flavored Scented Seeded Hinted have arrived.

As I sit at the drive through waiting for my NON-pumpkin flavored coffee I envision summer.  Kiwi scented candles decorating the counter of the coffee shop, “Jump Right In” by the Zac Brown Band playing on the radio.  I wonder if they’ve tried kiwi flavored coffee?  Would that even work?  Would any fruit work?  Strawberry, orange, lemon?  Something to ponder….

My chocolate nirvana is ready.  It’s basically hot cocoa with a bit of coffee added. See it’s more about the process than the actual caffeine.  It’s like heartburn relief to my brain.  One drink and I am soothed.  Time to head home and get to work.

As I walk into my house I see “True Blood Season 1” disks sitting in my pile of “stuff that doesn’t belong to me that I need to return.”  Yes, I actually have a bin labeled ” Stuff That Doesn’t Belong to Me That I Need to Return.”  (OCD much with the label maker?  Yes, yes I am.  And no… I don’t have a bin labeled “Stuff that Doesn’t Belong to Me That I Intend to Keep.”  That would be stealing.)  I look around my mud/laundry room and think to myself, “This room looks like Fangtasia after Bill stabbed the bartender to save Sookie.”

Discarded clothing caked in football mud, bling from preteen jeans, dog food dishes and shoes.  Burberry bags laying about?!?!  I mean really – I understand backpacks laying about – I don’t like it but I get it.  But do you know how much a BURBERRY BAG COSTS?!?!?!  WHY IS IT ON THE FLOOR!!!!?!?!  There are more shoes than any one household should have.  They are disheveled and everywhere.  Not in orderly pairs as I like them.  If a sonic boom passed through this room it would look better – maybe the boom would magically rearrange, clean and organize my mud/laundry room.  Who does that by the way?  Puts a mud room and a laundry room together.  As an entrance?  It was fine when we moved in and there only four of us – two of us being under the age of 5.  Now with six of us and four of the six being adult sized…..oh my.  Maybe the sonic boom could enlarge the room?  I mean if we’re going big, why not go SONIC BOOM big?

EJ out – to once again seek the caffeine for an altered morning routine.

My AWESOME words were submitted by The Momisodes.  If you’re not reading her, you missing out.  Do it – really – go check her out – follow her blog and read her on Facebook and Twitter.  She’s one of my favorites.  I feel pretty honored to have received her words!

The words she gave me : kiwi ~ fangtasia ~ sonic boom ~ keurig ~ Burberry ~ heartburn relief…….(Now I have to admit – I had to go and look up Burberry.  I so need to get out more…..)

Other amazing bloggers to read and follow – they participated in the “Use Your Words” post today – go see who got my words!!!

Baking In A Tornado

Spatulas on Parade

Stacy Sews and Schools

Follow me home

Battered Hope

The Bergham’s Life Chronicles

The Momisodes

Someone Else’s Genius

Confessions of a part-time working mom

Crumpets an Bollocks

Sparkly Poetic Weirdo

Eileen’s Perpetually Busy

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  1. Kiwi coffee?? Not sure that would work but I bet my oldest son would like to find out!!

    GREAT use of your words!!! LOL! Love how you worked them all in! I couldn’t have imagined all of them together! AWESOME

  2. I kind of always wondered what my Keurig’s insides look like 🙂 Glad you were able to get your coffee/chocolate fix in all at once. 🙂

  3. A purse should never, ever be on the ground.


    You rocked your words lady!

  4. Excellent use of your words.

    I appreciate you showing me the inside of a Keurig. I’m now even more in awe of the amazing piece of equipment.

    Will admit… when I first read the title, I thought you’d lost your mind. I was anticipating a recipe for Kiwi Pumpkin Coffee, and my tummy was less than excited!

    I hope your caffeine situation is righted now. I’m the same as you. I have a mental addiction to coffee/caffeine. It has no physical impact. I can drink two pots of coffee and go to sleep immediately.

    Great post! Thank you!

  5. I’m addicted to Diet Coke. I actually get headaches without it, but my “I write and read better drink” is the dragon fruit powder, walmart generic brand of Crystal Light. It would be coffee, and i love the taste of coffee, but for whatever reason, too much coffee makes me tired and nauseous. I blame old age, and that’s just ironically sad in many ways.

    • ERMGGOD – the dragon fruit powder. YUM. Mix that with some diet sierra mist….omg sooooo good. I wish I liked coffee….it is so much cheaper…but yucky. YUCKY. I hate it! The picture was actually from my neighbor (used with her permission of course). Have a wonderful day!

  6. Ermahgerd, thank you for the kind words. Honestly, I wouldn’t have known what Burberry was either, if not for my knockoff I got at Goodwill. It only cost $3. I’m good. lol I honestly just looked around the room to get words…..and you used them awesomely! So with that, I’m out now….gotta go to Starbucks for my pumpkin spice frappe fix!

    • No! Just say no to pumpkin spice! Just kidding – but I will leave it all to you. I don’t even really like pumpkin pie. I do like pumpkin muffins tho…..

      I’m off to clean the third house of the day and taking my Diet Coke with me! Gotta do what a girl’s gotta do….

  7. What a great job tying those words together. YES, I do know what a Burberry costs – oh DEAR!

  8. Love Burberry. HATE having my morning coffee routine disrupted. NEED COFFEE.

  9. Hey, it’s okay that you didn’t know Burberry. It’s not like normal people can afford that sh–tuff, anyway. But I’m so happy you knew what Fangtasia was! I loved that show. I’m sad that it’s gone now. 🙁

    • I haven’t seen the last few seasons but I’m one who reads all of the show synopsis so I know how it ends. I’ll still check it out as it becomes available for free somewhere!!! No HBO here – booooo! Game of Thrones is a hard one to wait for too!

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