Evil Joy Speaks

Spawning the next generation of evil genius, one misadventure at a time

Absence Makes the Heart…

Grow fonder?  Right – you’ve all missed me right?  Say yes, please – my fragile ego would love that.

Well, absence makes my heart beat like a wild and crazy thing afraid it’s going to stop.

Yes, it’s that time of year again folks.  The “anniversary” of Dr. Evil’s ‘birth.’ degree earning spawning.

And he’ll be in Germany on the three days that rock my world.  Making new and happy memories.  Wait – he doesn’t have many memories of those three days – just feeling like crap for a day or two and then that’s it until December 1st.  (And that post – the one for December 1st – is going to rock folks – I’m planning it already.)

I will be here.  With our spawn.  Trying to make fun new memories.

While not reliving the bad ones.  At least not over and over.  And over.

There’s the 19th – we had the birthday party for Eldest Female Spawn – he was miserable.  There’s the 20th – it was a Sunday and he felt like a mac truck ran him over.  Then there’s the 21st.  The day they put him in a coma.  For a LONG FREAKING 10 days.  And that was 2 years ago.  One day, hopefully soon, I won’t be ruled during these days by fear but will rejoice in the new memories made.  Be more thankful than fearful.  More “look what we’ve done in the time since ‘then.'”  More “oh yeah – that one time in November we went on this amazing trip – and oh yeah – it did coincide with the days he got sick – I didn’t realize those days lined up again….”

This year – I’m so thankful because I’m fearful if I’m not thankful enough….something bad will happen.

I know this isn’t true.  But that doesn’t stop the thought from rolling around in my head.  Especially after he pulled this one on me last winter.  With some of the same symptoms he experienced the previous year.

December 1st felt like Christmas two years ago.  Last year it was a huge sigh of relief.  He’d been ‘awake’ for a year.  A full year.

This year I think it’ll feel like Christmas and my birthday all combined into one.  And Dr. Evil – as the gift giving time of year is approaching – I’ve sent you a picture of what I want for Christmas/Anniversary/Birthday/Valentine’s Day.  It’s easy – it’s pretty inexpensive – in fact – it’s super inexpensive as it would take care of 4 gift giving opportunities.  This is just like an infomercial!!!   (And by the way – yes – all those wonderful days do occur between Christmas and Valentine’s Day.)

It’s the wedding band that matches the ones we wear.  Just like the one I wear.  And the extra one I wore for a month while he was sick and then recovering.  His.  And I never want to have to wear his again.  Ever.

Now…he’d better always plan on wearing his from that day forward or I’ll go Total Evil Joy on his arse.  Can you imagine the action figure?!

So this year, I’m making new happy memories.  We are going out to pizza.  They are going to bed.  I’m drinking wine.  That’s a start, right?


EJ out – to try to keep my dog from eating my spawns’ lunch boxes.


I’ve fallen out of the Top 25 Humor Blogs yet again!?!  Can you help a girl out – click on the juggling lady there on the upper right.  You’ll be casting a vote for me at Top Mommy Blogs.  Thanks!  Let’s keep that Evil Joy Action Figure in the bag and not force her creation just yet….the teenage years are approaching in force here…got to have something in the bag.


  1. You will make it through and he will be fine!!!!

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