Evil Joy Speaks

Spawning the next generation of evil genius, one misadventure at a time

Brain Dead Evil Driving…

Evil Joy here with a post about driving while tired, with fighting spawn in compact car, while Evil Hubby is away on travel, and …. police.

So.  Monday.  Monday was the normal Monday.  I am odd in the fact I don’t find Monday’s to be Evil in the slightest.  I like them.  Start of a new week, waiting to see what Evil exploits will unfold.

Got through Monday.  Remained un-Evil.

Time for softball for Eldest Female Spawn.  I talked Littlest Spawn (#4) in to staying with Eldest Spawn meaning I only had to take two Spawn to ball.  Then Spawn #4 found out practice was at a school with a playground.  So…off go the 4 of us – Evil Joy and all her Evil Female Spawn – Bawahahahahaha!

Driving.  Driving.  Driving.  Singing really loud with the radio – we make quite the Evil Quartet!

Then the Evil Arguing ensued.  Eldest Female Spawn touched Spawn #3 and then Spawn #4.  Did I mention they are shoved in the back of Evil Hubby’s compact car?  Shoulder to car seated Shoulder?  Two backed boosters and one unbacked booster (my spawn are short and will most likely be in boosters for their natural lives!)

Missed the turn to N.Hudson Elementary.  Opps.  Went down another street that runs perpendicular to the ball fields.

(Mind you – I’ve driven this so many Evil-Freaking-Times I normally make it there in my sleep.)

So I hang a right, pull into the parking lot adjacent to the fields.  I noticed a police officer sitting there when I parked.  Then he pulled in behind me.

Evil Words thought very loudly in my head.  Evil Heart Rate increase.  WTHeck!?!?  I had absolutely no idea why he was getting out to talk to me.  The Spawn of Evil Joy were concerned Evil Joy was headed to jail.

“Why did you go the wrong way down a one-way street?”

WHAT?@!?!  OMWord!?!?!?!?!?!?!  I CAN’T BELIEVE I DID THAT?!?!?!


I didn’t have a good answer other than I completely unaware of the 4 – yes – 4 signs telling you not to go that direction on that street.

Thank God for a clean driving record.  I got off with a “Don’t do that again, okay!?”  (I even told him – in my panic – I’m the world’s biggest Evil Rule Follower – to a fault normally!)

So…One Way signs – please jump up and down at me if I try to drive the wrong way.  Wrong Way signs – wave your arms or something.  I can’t get pulled over again – my Evil Heart can’t take the poundings induced by activities other than running!

Evil Joy out – to plan a new route not involving said One Way streets.

(sign images from – trafficsign.us, shutterstock.com)


  1. My favorite part about this post is the totally rule-following but completely correct citing of the photos you used at the bottom of the post! I love this!!

    • Yup – I am such a rule follower!!! It’s sort of funny – I actually like rules because then I have I boundary and know what/where I can/can’t do/go!!!!

  2. This is just way too funny! Glad you did not get a ticket.

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