Evil Joy Speaks

Spawning the next generation of evil genius, one misadventure at a time

Sobbing Showers….

This morning SEFS (Second Eldest Female Spawn – age 9) had a massive meltdown.

Let me back up and set the scene. Monday night was ball. For all the girls. We didn’t get home and get them to bed until 9:30. (Keep in mind I’m Evil and they go to bed by 8pm at the latest most nights). Due to the late hour we skipped showers and told the Littles they could deal with washing up in the morning. They had a hard time settling. Finally around 9:45 they were quiet.


This morning dawned early for Eldest Female Spawn as she and Eldest leave for the bus at 6:37. The Littles were still asleep. Then it was 7:10 am. SEFS got up and got dressed immediately. She is very task focused and sometimes hyper focuses when overwhelmed. Littlest was down eating in the kitchen and SEFS came stomping in, wrapped in a blanket with weird glow in the dark eyes. I welcomed her to the day and gently reminded her to shower soon.

And that, my friends, is where things went south. South Pole south.

She stomped off, threw herself dramatically on the stairs and started bawling. Deep, gut wrenching sobs.

Over a freaking shower.

Have I mentioned I don’t have a lot of patience or tolerance for behavior I deem inappropriate? No? Well I don’t.

I told her she had 2 minutes to pull herself together and get up to shower before the kids I babysit arrived. She dramatically made her way up to take a bath – most likely at this point simply because I told her to take a shower. (I figured that is what she would do ….hahahahaha – reverse psychology. What a victory….I outwitted 9 year old.)

She sobbed the entire time. But not really. It was this weird sob / hysterical laugh combination that had me watching her to see if her head would spin or if she would start spewing frogs or levitating. It was the laugh of horror movies and I wish I’d captured it on video.

This overtired kid pulled her shit together and got ready for school. She rocked her day. While I hate that her day had such a rocky start, I’m proud of her for conquering herself and getting on with a good day.

Proof a good – albeit strange – cry can help you get through. I know a few adults who could learn from her.

But I want to be there to witness the head spinning, frog spewing levitation that takes place!

EJ out – to order up some business cards!  If you order a book from me I’ll sign it and send you one of these snazzy cards I’m working on!  PM and we’ll get it set up!


  1. Funny, I want to do an ugly, crazy, levitating cry myself every morning.

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