Evil Joy Speaks

Spawning the next generation of evil genius, one misadventure at a time

Tag: Christmas (page 1 of 2)

Happy HalloHoliday

I wrote this a while back but as I get out Christmas lights in preparation for tomorrow’s decorating…it seemed appropriate to hit “Publish.”

 

Happy Halloween! Happy Thanksgiving! Happy Christmas! Happy HalloHoliday!

Yup, I did it. I mentioned Thanksgiving and Christmas prior to the strike of midnight on Halloween. I committed that sin. Through the years, I’ve been a staunch supporter of acknowledging only one celebration at a time, the next not allowed prior to the completion of the current. Meaning No Thanksgiving Until Halloween is over and No Christmas until Thanksgiving is done. And certainly, NO CHRISTMAS BEFORE EITHER HALLOWEEN OR THANKSGIVING!

As I’ve gotten older, my holiday acknowledgment rules have slipped a bit. I’m a planner. Today is Halloween. Last Monday, 26 October, I completed 90% of my Christmas shopping. In one trip. All local businesses downtown. And even better, a lot of the stuff I bought comes packaged up nicely so I don’t have to wrap a ton of stuff. I’d guess you can say I ran rampant over my holiday rule. But you know what? I’m going to relax and enjoy the snow when it comes and focus more time with and on my family instead of shopping myself into exhaustion.

I work a seasonal job in the winter. My time becomes more limited than normal. I have ridiculous expectations for myself. Any little thing I can do to ease the stress I do. If that means shopping for December in October, you bet your arse I do it. I was able to pick gifts thoughtfully and calmly. My girls and I took advantage of a day off school and made the most of our amazing local businesses. We do get gift cards for out of town family as exchanges are hard if something doesn’t work.  But for the most part this year we accomplished my goal of shopping local.

We put up our Christmas lights as soon as we can. Normally it would have been yesterday but we all needed a break so maybe next weekend. I live in a part of the country where Halloween can mean 70 degrees and pleasant or feet upon feet of snow like the “Storm of 1991.” Doing it early just means less frostbite later.

This year we host Thanksgiving. I will attempt to decorate for Christmas before everyone arrives. Once Thanksgiving is here I typically am full steam ahead with my seasonal gig and lose my decorating mojo. I try to make Christmas magical for the kids and that means not losing my shit over decorating last minute.

So here’s my advice. Because I know you want it. Let people be what they are and embrace what matters to you. Just make sure not to complain about the constant playing of Hallmark movies in my house when you’re here. I love them and you’ll be dead to me if you rip on them too much.

qtq80-6KBFNa

Proper Pairings

If you’ve ever struggled with wine or adult beverage pairings, I’ve got the manual for you. The perfect drink makes the perfect moment more special. A pairing misstep may lead to a failed event which could lead to a failed day which could completely and totally ruin your ENTIRE HOLIDAY SEASON!

We can’t have that. So I’ve devised the following pairing guide for you. Take it as a guide and tweak it to make it your own!

Shopping with children : Spicy Chocolate Coffee followed by a spicy chocolate coffee with Rumchata. While out and about the coffee will keep you on your game and help you wrangle overstimulated children. You can find your way about the store while desperately trying to remember everything you need and searching for the child hiding in the clothing racks. Once home add a bit of Rumchata to keep your from losing your mind when you realize the one thing you needed from the store … is the one thing you forgot.

Ornament craft with children : Diet Coke. After the seventh attempt and seventh time sweeping broken glass up off the floor add a shot of your favorite rum to your diet coke. That way by the tenth time sweeping up broken glass you’ll be okay with the situation. You can send your spouse out to buy another set of ten glass ornaments because you obviously didn’t learn anything the first ten attempts.

Decorating the Christmas tree : A nice white wine. Because…it’s Christmas. It’s a tree. And if you’re like me, you have enough ornaments for three trees. Each ornament has a memory. A walk down memory lane takes a bottle hour or two.

Prepping the turkey for a family gather : Ginger Beer. Why you ask? Because it’s my favorite and raw meat of any kind is WRONG. Gross and wrong. And since I have to clean out the inside cavity of a dead bird in my kitchen (where I will have to bleach all the things because RAW MEAT) I may add some lime juice and vodka to that ginger beer to make a nice Moscow Mule. Since I then will be stuffing food into the cavity of this dead bird, I’ll have another Moscow Mule because DEAD BIRD, CAVITY, and having to touch all of those things.

Wrapping Gifts : Hot Chocolate with Fireball. Nothing says cozy and fun like a nice homemade hot cocoa. Use a little Dutch cocoa powder to whip it up. After your partner steals all the geometrically pleasing shapes to wrap the Fireball eases the fact you’ll be wrapping all the non-normal shaped packages. All the blankets and toys with heads sticking out one side. All of the slippers in their slipper shaped packages. And that one shaped like a fishing pole. The fireball will increase your chances of not stabbing yourself with scissors before you’re done.

I hope these pairings make your holiday season more enjoyable. Feel free to alter these pairings to make them fit your situation. And then tell me about them!

EJ out – to drink up a glass of water. For real. A big huge glass of water. I ran a ways today and I’m dehydrated.

WIN_20151124_222155

 

Mom, Can I Wear Makeup?

It’s Homecoming here in Raider Land.  Eldest Female Spawn (11, ALMOST 12!) asks, ” Mom, can I wear makeup to the game tonight?”

Ummm…no.  My first reason….your grammar.

Yes, I am a grammar freak.  Had you said, “Mom, may I wear makeup tonight?” I would have said……”Ummm NO.”

You’re in sixth grade my baby doll.  You’re not old enough.  I know you want to grow up, become more mature and more like the high school girls.

No.  Stop it.  I can’t take my baby doll growing into a young woman.  A pretty cool cat too.  You’re rocking the new glasses.  You’re nailing the grades.  Softball is going well.  You’re running on your own after school every day.

You. Are. Growing. Up.

i’m. not. ready.

It seems like last week when you couldn’t quit brush your own hair.  We would fight and then go get your hair cut off short to a cute pixie style.  Wasn’t it just yesterday when we went to Target and you shared popcorn with your bestie K while her mom and I shopped?  Didn’t you just learn to tie your shoes?  Didn’t we just take you to the first day of kindergarten?

Fast forward a few months.  Now you’re 12.  You have a phone.  You politely and respectfully present your case for being allowed to wear makeup.  Still, I resist.

But now you’ve grown and matured more and more.  Your only request for Christmas was makeup.

0

I decided I had to let you grow up a little.  I want to be there to support you as you grow up, participate and enjoy your experiences, not prevent or dread them.

So we did it, you and I together.  We went to the Mall of America.  We had some one on one time.  You got your make up and lesson from a very talented makeup artist.  She taught you the beauty you possess is you…not the makeup you wear.  I could (and have told) tell you that until I was blue in the face.  But hearing it from another woman, one who deals with makeup and faces every day, it finally sunk in.  You.  Are.  Beautiful.

You.

Not the makeup on your face.

You.

I’m so proud of the young woman you’re becoming.

I love you.

IMG_5658
IMG_5658

IMG_5657

It's the Most Wonderful Time…..

Today’s post is a writing challenge. This is how it works: participating bloggers picked 4 – 6 words or short phrases for someone else to craft into a post. All words must be used at least once and all the posts will be unique as each writer has received their own set of words. That’s the challenge, here’s a fun twist; no one who’s participating knows who got their words and in what direction the writer will take them. Until now.

Screen Shot 2014-01-16 at 8.23.16 PM

Christmas is less than two weeks away!  I don’t care if any one bah humbugs me or not.  I love Christmas.  This year I’m finding a little more of the excitement and joy (pardon the pun) in the season.   The last few years have been a little flat for me but this year I feel more and more like myself!

The weekend before Thanksgiving I got out my Christmas decor.  I know…I’m one of those people….but at least let me explain the reason behind my ridiculous jolly behavior.  I have TWENTY totes.  Twenty red totes with green lids.  Not to be confused with the three black totes with orange lids or the pastel totes with grey lids.  Or the green tote with a white lid.  (I think I have a problem…..  Actually I grew up in a house that flooded twice so everything we own that is ‘stored’ is in a plastic tote “just in case.”  If our house floods, the city below has completely washed away!)  It takes copious amounts of time to get all the decorations out, the normal decor put away, the Christmas decorations displayed properly, and all those mother loving totes carried back downstairs.  It takes two days usually.  Because…I’m me.

So the Saturday before Thanksgiving dawns and I head off to my new part time job at the ski hill.  I come home and start nicely asking the spawn to carry up my totes.  We take over the kitchen table.  Each figurine or other item has so many memories attached to it and we talk through many of them.  Then we get to work because otherwise there’s no kitchen table…or counter…or island to eat dinner on.  I have Santas made of wood, ceramic Santas, even one croqueted out of lace.

I come across so many wonderful things.  Inevitably with all the little hands helping, something requires superglue.  But that is fun in and of itself.  Dr. Evil will put out the super glue, the standard glue, or the epoxy depending on the situation.

Then…the cookbooks.  I start my baking early.  I know which cookies and bars/squares (what do you call them – I found many things have odd names in this part of the country – a hot dish is a casserole not a heating plate as I found out at my first work party!) may be frozen happily for a month and which need to be consumed more quickly.  The Littles help me cook.  We start with massive hand washing, adorning of the aprons in the appropriate sizes, and then….pinches of spices, flours, sugars, and everything in between start a-flying.

Dr. Evil is a great sport during all of this.  Every year I say I’ll get it done in one day.  He just smiles and shakes his head knowing it will be a full two days before our house looks not like a war zone but festive and happy.  He definitely subscribes to the mantra of “When in Rome…” living with me.  He’s a good cookie.

20131201-181512.jpg

My words were: Jolly ~ Lace ~ Red ~ Dawn ~ Pinch of spice ~ When in Rome

They were submitted by the awesome: The Bergham’s Life Chronicles

Now check out more posts!   You’ll be happy you did!!!

Baking In A Tornado

Spatulas on Parade

Follow me home

Battered Hope

Stacy Sews and Schools

The Bergham’s Life Chronicles

Juicebox Confession

Eileen’s Perpetually Busy 

Confessions of a part-time working mom

Sparkly Poetic Weirdo

Little Lies…

THIS IS FOR ADULTS.  IF YOU HAVE A LITTLE ONE READING OVER YOUR SHOULDER SHOOO THEM AWAY.   MY VIEWS ON MYTHICAL CREATURES ARE DISCUSSED.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

….

Here’s a question for you.

Do you think it’s okay to lie to your children?  Ever?  Little white lies?  Big huge lies?

When my children ask me if Regions, our Elf on the Shelf, moves about by himself my answer always is, “What do you think?” Always the same question when it comes to Santa, The Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny.  I don’t say, “Yes” or “No” or “Maybe.”  I ask them and gauge their reaction.  I look to see if it’s time for a different discussion or if they’re happy where they are with their beliefs.

Tomorrow Eldest Female Spawn will be 12 years old.  She is receiving a cell phone as a present.  It was going to be a surprise.  I had it all worked up in my mind.

//ACT/

Setting : Living room.  Fire place blazing as snow falls softly outside picture window.  Family members sprawled about the living room on the couches and floor.  Dogs laying quietly by the birthday girl’s feet.  Mom holding camera and Dad reminding Mom to actually take pictures with the camera,   

Scene : Female Spawn has three presents from parents/siblings and a couple of cards from Grandparents.  She chooses the largest one on Mom’s urging.  And then….

“RING RING!!”

The smallest box starts ringing.  Eldest Female Spawn screams in delight.  She is thrilled and happy and gives us copious hugs.

Scene Note : Eldest Spawn is silently brooding.  He had to wait until he was 13.5 for a phone.  We placate him by explaining at least he’ll be free to snowboard without her as they’ll both have phones.

/END SCENE/ END ACT//

Obviously the above scene is some figment of my imagination as everyone saw the phone in the kitchen.  It stood out as it’s not an Apple product.  But free people.  And nice.  (We have awesome friends.)  At first we said Dr. Evil was fixing it for our friend.  They knew better and saw through our lie.

Then I got this text the next day. “DID YOU GET HER A PHONE?!?!?  She said she found one in Dad’s night stand.” from Eldest Spawn.  I call home immediately and rip Eldest Female Spawn a new one.  ONE DOES NOT SNOOP IN PARENTS’ ROOM – or any room – for that matter and a discussion of boundaries takes place.  We talk about respect and limits.  Again I adhere to Dr. Evil fixing the phone for our friend.

But in the end, it came out.  She’s getting a phone.  And she knows it.

She upped the ante.  Dr. Evil last night went to put some apps on it and set it up for her.  She’d already done it.  We were both flabbergasted at her behavior.  We moved the phone and left a note, “DO NOT LOOK FOR IT!!! : )  EVERY DAY YOU MESS IWTH IT IS ONE DAY LATER YOU GET IT!”

Someone questioned me on what our penance would be for lying to her about it being a gift.  I answered, “We have to live with her while making her wait.”  And trust me.  It is penance.

But it got me to thinking.  It is okay to tell little lies?  Is it okay to allow the magic of childhood to continue?  Is answering a question with a question okay?

The answer in my world.  Absolutely.

The world isn’t black and white.

What about you?  Do you think it’s ever okay to be less than honest with your children?

IMG_4847

EJ out – to get some kids out the door so they don’t miss the bus.  And I”m being truthful with them.  “MOVE YOUR BUTTS!  I AM NOT DRIVING YOU TO THE BUS STOP!”  Because if they miss the bus I’ll drive them to school, not the bus stop.  See, I can tell the truth.

If you could take a single click and vote for me at Top Mommy Blogs, I’d appreciate it.  Just click on the little juggling lady on the upper right.  If you’re on a mobile device, scroll all the way down and you’ll find her.

Strange….And a Little Sick

Want a random fact that will stick in your head for a few days?

Do ya? Do ya?

Okay, but first you have to read a story.  A story with a sad ending for some rats.

As Christmas approached, Dr. Evil was asked if our family would like to own some rats.  His lab boss had a nice set up with four rats he was graciously giving away.  Dr. Evil and I pondered it and then realized….it’s FREE.  It’s Christmas time and it’s FREE.  It would be the ‘big’ gift and … it was FREE!  And really, how much does rat food and bedding cost?

And before you ask, as many have asked, the rats were not from a lab.  They were not lab rats.  They belonged to someone who worked in a lab.  But the rats were from a home.  Not tested on, not genetically altered, none of that.

Now…on with the story.

We tricked the spawn.  Dr. Evil brought the set up home and got our four little (gross) rats settled in.  I had the spawn out snowboarding.  Dr. Evil called me and texted Eldest Spawn.

“You need to come home.  There is a huge infestation.  It’s downstairs and I need your mom.” he texted to Eldest.

I played the part well when he called.  I got all concerned and worried about the basement and the fact that if you see one mouse, there are 20 more you don’t see.  Or so I read somewhere.

Eldest Spawn’s bedroom is downstairs along with our rec room.  It’s a finished basement so I was really cheesing it up.  Eldest became concerned about his room.  We flew home as fast as one can after loading 5 snowboards, 5 people, and all the gear that goes with into the truck.  And driving home on snowy roads.

It was priceless.  Their reaction was exactly as one would expect from my spawn.  Eldest Female Spawn immediately picked one up and started kissing it.  The name game began.  We ended up with four female rats named Butterscotch, Patrick, Rusty, and Tator.  Tator was Tator because the rat had a tumor larger than the rat itself.  But she still got around just fine and seemed happy.


Over the next few months the rats became Eldest Female Spawn’s rats.  She took care of their cage and feed them.  She became attached.  She even spent a good portion of her Christmas money on a rat ball – like a hamster ball – for the rats to roam around in.  The dogs were curious but carefully watched around the rats.  A peace treaty was reached between the six animals.  The dogs agreed to sniff the rats, the rats agreed to be sniffed and all was well.

Until….another rat developed a tumor.  And this one wasn’t so pretty.  It was raw and looked painful.  And it grew literally over night.  Within a week it was huge.

A decision was made.  Tator’s tumor was now so large she had a hard time getting around and even got stuck in the running wheel once.  Butterscotch’s tumor looked awful and the other rats were making it worse.

Now.  For the strange fact that will stick with you……

 

Did you know that it costs approximately $12.00 to buy a fancy rat?

Did you know that is costs approximately $12.50 to euthanize a fancy rat?

 

You can’t make this shit up.  Seriously.  You can’t.

 

Needless to say, we now own 2 rats.  Until next week at least.  I dealt with the death of the first two rats and the devastated spawn who held them as they died.  I am not doing this alone again.  Ever.  And I need to find another box to bring the next set of dead rats home to be buried.  I used my one nice box.

Eldest Female Spawn has decreed the remaining rats on death row deserve just as nice of a box.

I met a blogger on line and he inspired me to write this.  You should check out his blog – it is amazing and I’m now a die hard follower.  You should be too!  Daddy Anarchy can be found at www.daddyanarchy.com, on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/daddyanarchyblog, on twitter @DaddyAnarchy.  Do it.  Follow the Daddy Anarchy!

EJ out – to take a dog for a run.  Because I’m cool like that.

 

Help a rat killing gal out.  Click on the Top Mommy Blogs icon there on the upper right.  One click.  That’s it!  Thanks!!!

 

Secret Subject Swap – Don't Mess With Me!

 

Welcome to a Secret Subject Swap. This week, 12 brave bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts.  (And kudos to Karen – thankful she takes to the time to have the swap!!!)

 

Secret Subject Swap

 

My topic is the brain baby of A Working Mom’s “Whoas” and I love it.  LOVE IT!  Here goes…. 

Littlest was playing at the park.  She jumped off a swing and landed…sort of.  And then fell on her bum.  Luckily for her the snow piled was soft so she giggled.  She hopped up.  Her mad skills caught the eye of a slightly older child.  He walked over.  As Christmas just passed, presents were all the talk of the playground.  

Littlest started to head for the swing again but ‘the boy’ got there first.  She waited her turn and he jumped off and landed with grace and style.  And a funny noise!

Littlest exclaimed, “Hey!!  That’s the sound my Furby makes when you shake it!  Santa brought me and my sisters each one.  They talk to each other!!” 

To which “the boy” replied, “You know, my older sister told me there’s no Santa and I totally believe her because she told me exactly where Mom and Dad hid the gifts and I went snooping.”

Littlest’s smile faltered.  Her eyes became downcast.  “He couldn’t be right could he?” she thought?  Her eyes ‘got water in them’ as she says when she’s trying to hide she’s crying.

Then a warm thought wrapped her heart in happiness.  Her eyes dried up and her smile returned to full watt force.

“Nope.  You’re wrong.  We watched Polar Express and you’re just one of those people who can’t hear the bell.  That’s sad.  I hope you can hear the bell again  because Christmas is way more fun for kids!  Want another turn on the swing?”

Now it was his turn.  He couldn’t get her words out of his cute little 7-year-old head.  Maybe just maybe his sister was picking on him?  Because she likes to do that.  And she didn’t get as many presents as he did.  Maybe…maybe he’d have to believe again.

(GO LITTLEST!  BRING ONE MORE FOR THE PRO-SANTA TEAM!!!)

 

My prompt was : If someone told your kid Santa didn’t exist what would the conversation look like….. 

 Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts.  Sit back, grab a cup, and check them all out. See you there:

 

http://www.BakingInATornado.com                         Baking In A Tornado

http://followmehome.shellybean.com                   Follow me home . . .

http://themomisodes.com                                       The Momisodes

http://thethreegerbers.blogspot.ch/                          Confessions of a part-time working mom

http://aworkingmomswhoas.com/                           A Working Mom’s “Whoas”’

http://www.eviljoyspeaks.wordpress.com                   Evil Joy Speaks

http://xcartwight.blogspot.com                                 Go Momma!

http://www.juiceboxconfession.com                             Juicebox Confession

http://stacysewsandschools.wordpress.com/                 Stacy Sews and Schools

http://singlemumplusone.blogspot.com                       Searching for Sanity

http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com                       Spatulas on Parade

http://www.smalltalkmama.com                                 Small Talk Mama

The Outcome…Battle of the Seasons 2013

Schmucky Shmuck here with the final battle update on the Battle of the Seasons.  Regions the Elf and the Thanksgiving Decor have fought to the bitter end.  Who won?  Who lost?  Read on dear readers, read on.

The Thanksgiving Decor trapped Regions and the Elf.  I can’t say he didn’t have it coming.  But…did they pay him back…or did they go too far?

Screen Shot 2013-12-04 at 7.39.33 AM

They got him and they got him good!

Screen Shot 2013-12-04 at 6.58.13 AM

The Thanksgiving Decor got Regions the Elf to the top of the mantel by tricking Dr. Evil into helping.  And then….the unthinkable happened.

Screen Shot 2013-12-04 at 7.05.52 AM

Regions the Elf suffered impact injuries.  And once again, Burton Puppy was used to as a tool of Evil and dragged him around the house.

But….Regions the Elf….

Had the FINAL WORD.

Screen Shot 2013-12-04 at 7.13.36 AM

He was overheard saying, “Later suckers.  Enjoy the moth balls.”

And look at the smile on that cheeky Elf’s face.

This has been the final report by Schmucky Schmuck on the Battle of the Season 2013.  I’m sure there will be more battles to report on in my future.  Will the Thanksgiving Decor stay packed away?  Will Regions be haunted by his injuries?  Will Burton Puppy be forced to do more Evil?  Stay tuned.

EJ out – because really – after all that – I’m sort of done.

However….I’ve taken a huge FALL in the ratings of the Humor Section of Top Mommy Blogs.  If you could find it in your holiday hearts to click on the Top Mommy Blogs icon there on the right, I’d be in a more festive spirit!  Thanks!

I'm Being Brave and Sharing ….

My love of Christmas decorations in the stores.

There.  I said it.

I Love Christmas Decorations in all the Stores.

I Love Christmas music on the radio 24/7.  I love the ads.  I love the lights.  I love the music on in the stores.  I love the bell ringers.  I love Regions the Elf.

IMG_3212

I do wish it would wait until after Halloween.  But my heart does a little happy dance when I see the big lit up trees in Target or Wal-Mart…Walgreens or County Market.  Knowing today the world as we experience it here in our town and the near by Twin Cities of St. Paul and Minneapolis will be about all things red, green, bright, and light.

Thanksgiving used to be my favorite.  It’s not so much anymore.  I actually would be happy to skip it all together.  But that’s for another blog post.

I was a staunch supporter of “No Christmas Decor until after Thanksgiving!” for many years.  Then, we had spawn and started traveling with said spawn.  Now, we usually do the decorations the weekend before Thanksgiving so Thanksgiving Day and the days following are all about having fun, relaxing, and enjoying each other.

Because in my house there are 20 totes of Christmas Decorations.  All in their happy little red and green bins.  (Halloween has three totes, Thanksgiving has one tote, Easter has three totes, St. Patrick’s Day and Valentine’s Day share one tote (I know – it’s a travesty!) and summer has its own tote.)  Christmas decorations are stored separately under the stairs so they don’t block all the other totes.  I adore my house but there is so little storage it’s sort of ridiculous!  Keeps me from being a hoarder though.  Of all things.  Except…Christmas Decorations.

I feel a renewed sense of excited about Christmas.  I’m actually Looking Forward to getting out my decorations.  I’m not fearful like I was last year.  (And my totes have increased from 12 to 20….organization and a Mom who loves to hand down her things – and she makes me look like a slacker when it comes to the love of all things Christmas!)

I’m not dreading the mess.  Dr. Evil won’t be earning another PhD. mid-decorating.  He will not get sick and be in a coma like two years ago.  He will not show many of the same symptoms and end up sick like last year.

Or I’ll have to beat him up with Christmas dancing animals (we have a large, LARGE collection) and tie him up with strings of half burnt out lights.  And then let the Halloween sugar crazed spawn attack.

So there world.  I have shared my secret.  My secret love of all the things that drive many crazy.  I LOVE CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS!

Until Christmas night (which is around 29 December at my house – we travel…what can I say?).  When that shit is down and put away before bed so December 30th dawns with a clean and tidy house!

Let the red, green, light, and bright puking of decor BEGIN!!!!!!!!!!

IMGP7620

EJ out – to stop the unfair trading practices occurring in my kitchen.  Halloween candy wars begin…..NOW!

 

I’m falling out of the top 20 Humor Blogs again at Top Mommy Blogs!  Help me out!  Click on the juggling lady up there on the right.  On a mobile device, view full post, scroll to the bottom and there you’ll find the juggling lady to click upon!  THANK YOU!!!!

Really Santa…Really?

Evil Joy here with a post on Santa requests and the meeting of said requests.

So the Littles of the Spawn asked for makeup.  Being the awesome Evil Joy I am I got them some.  Or rather Santa did.  And I Santa didn’t just get them some….I Santa got them this…..

0001933322625_AV_60X60

The Largest Kit they had…..

So tonight Hair Chox from the birthday party made it out and joined the Evil Make Over Party.

WTHeck was I Santa thinking?!?!?  Really dude?  Really?

So make up – and hair chalk – watch yourselves…I have soap and a washcloth…and more soap and more wash clothes…and Goof Off and Goo Gone.  My Female Spawn will not leave this lair looking like Evil Hootchie Mamas.

IMG_3712

Imagine if this woke you up in the middle of the night?!

IMG_3713

Other than looking way way way older than 10…not too bad….but still not leaving the lair….

IMG_3714

Eye Shadow everywhere….

EJ out – to prepare myself for the Evil Epic Makeup Removal Before Bed Battle.

 

Help a girl out – click on the juggling lady in the upper right to cast a vote for me at TMB – I’m in the humor blog section – have breached the top 10 Humor blogs once again – thanks for getting me there.  Now help keep me there by clicking on that juggling lady.  Or I’ll go Evil on your arse……  (thanks…)

Older posts

© 2019 Evil Joy Speaks

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑